Monday, June 13, 2011
Hey, look! A camel!
I have put off starting a blog for years. I always say: "Why put off until tomorrow what you can put off until the day after tomorrow?" So, this is my improvised entry into the blog world. I was planning for it to be more extravagant, but I'm not really at the top of my game right now. I'm about a week out of my 3rd failed marriage, and sitting at my mother's house in Indiana, on my way to Pennsylvania. I have to go back and try to sell off all of my things, scrap my neglected house, and hopefully see my kids, before I go off to parts unknown to start over - again. I'm sure that anyone reading this knows me from facebook, and you will surely see some writing here that I will also post to facebook, but I can write a lot more here, and I'm sure I will write here daily - at least until I get tangled-up with the next wrong woman, and neglect everything in my life for her. I know that sounds rather harsh, maybe bitter, cynical, even fatalistic, but, well - that's the way I feel about it, I guess. I wonder where I would be if I had put all the wasted energy into my own life, instead of using it all to try to fix someone else - or a few someone elses. I know - elses is not a word, and I don't really care. Sue me. English is a ridiculous language, anyhow. I will write more often, and include more content, depending on who reads it, and how much you all really want me to write, so let me know if you do - leave comments, and please, speak freely, as I value honest feedback. Thanks for reading.
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All I can say is "been there, done that"
ReplyDeleteGael, in a few years, when I'm a household name, and richer than Davy Crockett, you can proudly claim to be the first person to ever comment on my very first blog. Yay!
ReplyDeleteAnd on your birthday, even!
ReplyDeleteI am not sure that what I have to say will get through to you, anymore than anything else that I have said to you, but here goes! Todd I have learned that there is only one person in this world that you can please and that is yourself! Please do me a favor and take a deep look into that intelligent, creative , loving person that you have become and find your self worth! Mistakes are made, lessons learned, and now it is time to move to bigger and better things! There is no sense in beating yourself up..... We love you for who you are! Your virtual friend, Jean
ReplyDeleteI just wanted to let you know that I was here and read your blog---looking forward to more! Other than that---start using some energy on YOU!
ReplyDelete@Jean- Thank you, Jean. I am grateful for your kind and wise words. And you are not as much a "virtual" friend, as an "imaginary" friend. I plan to meet you this summer, anyhow. And Sarah.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Muldoon!
ReplyDeleteHEY!! Great start. Keep going
ReplyDeleteSo glad you got this started -- even though there is no mention that I was your first subscriber.... ;-)
ReplyDeleteI really don't know you....except for the very few weeks on facebook, so I can say nothing about who you are and what you're going through.... BUT....I can speak for what I have learned in my life for me....and maybe it will help in some way...either way..that's your choice, not mine.
ReplyDeleteYou mentioned that you had wasted your life on trying to fix others. And that statement would be correct. We can love another, we can support another, we can serve others in many different ways....BUT we can ONLY fix ourselves! We can't "fix" another person, only ourselves...and we can only fix ourselves if we CHOOSE to do so...and if we do it in a healthy way.
Maybe that is what your travels in life are trying to teach you...only you can figure that out for you. I do know that often, we will bang our heads against the wall again and again trying to find out way out of our situation...until we learn to look the other way, and see there is a door made just for us, in the right path we should go...and it was right there all along! We just were so stubborn in doing it the way we thought it should be...that we didn't look around and see a better way...and we missed it!
I will never suggest to anyone that "You need to think only of yourself" Because, I KNOW that this way of living leads to much bitterness, and unhappiness!
But I will say that you DO need to have daily self care....you do need to work on daily improving of yourself...(AS WE ALL DO!) But we also need to reach out and do service for others. (no matter how small) It also is very helpful for us to focus on the good things in our lives...and be grateful for them!
If you focus on your pains, and the negatives in your life...it will not help you, and will only eat you alive from the inside out...making your bitter, rather than better.
I hope in your life, and in your writings...that you will choose to find happiness, you will choose the better part.....that you will choose to see your blessings in life...that you will choose to find ways to pull yourself out of your woes, by being kind to, and finding ways to serve others. In this way...you will choose happiness, and peace, over bitterness, isolation, loneliness, and sadness.
I wish, hope, and pray for you all of the best moving forward...
Stay Strong!
Pam Volk
Pam, I'm not sure what to say, except- thank you. I will consider your words.
ReplyDelete